My journey hasn’t been all about weight loss. It’s been about the confidence I have in myself. It’s about the mindset I have about the world. It’s about the values I carry with me through life. It’s about feeling free and happy in my own skin.      A journey is about all the little things that most people can’t even see. 1000 little, insignificant moments that lead up to big, beautiful and extremely significant moments.       That's all I have for my daily life updates. Life is never all about one thing! It's always a series of things, big or small that lead to the most significant moments in life. We can never be defined as just one thing because in life, we evolve, change, grow and blossom into who we're supposed to be. And even then, we don't always know until the very end anyhow. Life is about growth, love, vulnerability, happiness, sadness, anger, mistakes and everything in between! XOXO

     Today was a good day!          I slept in! Then bowled 5 games, went shopping and got a couple of outfits, Halloween mugs, coffee and some snacks for the night! Then I picked up a few odds and ends grocery wise! Picked up my favorite salad from Qdoba and now I am home and watching the new(ish) Cruella!         I also ordered some waterproof cases for money and devices for the tubing trip this weekend!         Lately i’ve been working on a special project for my niece for Christmas and her birthday! She’s as obsessed with Harry Potter as I am so, if that doesn’t give you any indication of what it might be, I don’t know what will!         Let’s see, what else? Oh yeah, the most important part:         I’m working on an extremely low calorie and LOW carb, virtually sugar FREE chocolate cake! Yeah, you know I’ll be sharing the recipe as soon as I p...

                Why do I feel like I am always, “preparing” for a storm as of late!? We’re supposed to be getting high winds and hail today! SHOCKER! Not really, we’ve been getting regular storms for weeks now, I feel like they’re never ending!         We’ve been without power a few times and so now, whenever I get wind of a storm, I prep. Wanna know how?!   Lanterns Charging devices Buying a case of water Putting on comfy clothes... Warming up my rice bag... Crawling into bed... Turning on the t.v... Begin my binge on mindless television... Eat snacks... Listen to the storm... Sleep... Repeat...        Prep list gone wild! I have anxiety about a lot but i’m also an over-thinker so I’ve already thought of every worst case scenario in my head and I feel like they always go worse in my head then they do the real world! So I figure if anything happens worse than what I’ve created in the univ...

     Today we celebrated my nieces 6 th  birthday! It ’s in the 29 th , but her party was today! It was hot as BALLS today! 90+ degrees! Lord! I’m not complaining! BUT I can’t wait for fall weather! Warm, but not where my sweat is sweating!       Now I am back at home, showered, rotting in my comfy clothes with my rice bag on my back and gorping my brain out on bad tv and great music!         I took exactly one picture today of myself and it was before I sweat off the first layer of my skin! I only took it because I did something with hair for the first time in a probably 6 months! Normally I leave it naturally curly or braided.    Please enjoy: (She said sarcastically!)            I hope you have a wonderful weekend!    XOXO 

       Tonight the plan is Chinese food and my sisters homemade cheesecake along with board games and card games until the early AM like usual!          Game night is a pretty regular thing with my sister and brother in law! But I normally don’t cheat or try REALLY hard not to! I generally reserve these days for special occasions or when I am not feeling the greatest.         Well if you read my blog from yesterday, you know that I am NOT feeling my best. So today is the perfect day to binge on gut rotting food and play some games!         Once everyone gets out of work I’ll be heading over! Which my sister (Carly) will be getting out early hopefully and then she and I will pick up all the Chinese food and then head over!         I’m so excited to just relax and think about nothing for awhile! Too often I get stuck in this rut of, “everyday living” and, “bills, stress,...

     Being a woman is HARD work. Like if you’re not a female, you just don’t understand.        I am on day ONE of my seven day menstrual cycle.          You think, “oh it’s only 7 days out of a whole month.”         If you think that, you’re a MAN. Or, a woman with an easy period.         I PMS, 7-10 days BEFORE my period starts.         Then my period starts and I have mad cramps (thanks endometriosis and PCOS)         And then my cramps continue 1-2 days AFTER my period ends!         It’s awful!         And guess what has brought on this topic?! You guessed it! I’m menstruating! Which means I am a raging, emotional mess!         Which means that I am not available for ANNOYING things and people for the next 7 days!         Okay,...

     Being alone is such an alienating and cold feeling. When you don ’t have a significant other or many friends you just sort of get used to the quiet.          It’s not like I enjoy being alone, but I haven’t found my forever yet. And I don’t feel that it’s necessary to rush things or force things.         I hate to be a person who says, “I’m going to be forever alone” but, that might be true.         Even when I am in a room full of people, I still feel pretty alone. I guess I feel like I have to be EVERYTHING for everyone, all while I get subpar leftovers and 1/4 of the attention from others that I give to everyone else.         Maybe it’s my fault for allowing others to treat me like this? Or maybe it’s the company I keep? I don’t know? All I know is that it’s an empty feeling and I need to do something about it! I am much too important to allow myself to be treated i...

     I've been attached to my sewing machine making impromptu orders of rice bags! I posted on social media that I had made some for cozy season for myself and the crowd went wild! so I've been behind the sewing machine for the last couple of days!       Don't get me wrong I am so grateful, but I honestly just wanted to see if I still remembered how to sew! I taught myself how to sew during the height of the pandemic so I could help supply people with masks! I started off hand sewing them and then decided to invest in a sewing machine!       Now, many months later, I'm feeling my heartstrings being pulled by the machine again! I have always loved creating with my hands and this is such a fun way to create all the things! I want to learn how to make clothes next!       The only issue with this is that I am notorious for NOT following patterns. I always want to, "Figure it out for myself." I guess things have to li...

     Today was a great day!          I recently posted on my social media that I was making rice bags.. I didn ’t expect them to blow up the way that they did!         I am going to be attached to my sewing machine for the next two weeks straight! Don ’t get me wrong, I feel so blessed that people are supporting my endeavors! But I had no intention on selling them! I am an amateur with a sewing machine! So to say I feel blessed is an understatement!         So today I went shopping for an intense amount of fabric, a birthday present for my niece, odds and ends and then water shoes for the tubing trip in a couple of weeks!         Then my sister and I went to Qdoba for a quick and healthy dinner!         Went home, dropped off all the goods and put stuff away and then went to my nephews soccer game...        Let me tell you someth...

          Sunday is the day of rest, so I am taking that as my cue to do absolutely nothing today! I woke up today hurting 10X worse than yesterday! Something about letting your body marinate all night long and letting your bones and muscles settle into the whacked out displacements overnight, really has a way of making you feel OLD!          Everything hurts today! Everything!         I guess it’s time to face the facts, I am no longer a characterized as a young person! Gone are my limber days! I am officially old and feeble.        I get out of bed nowadays and I can feel my rickety old body, pop and crack and you can hear my moans and groans from near and far.    I workout regularly I’m a fairly active person now        There are just little mythical creatures who come in the night to beat on my bones and wrench on my muscles.       ...

     Impromptu family day!         We all went over to mom and dads house today to swim and watch a movie at the outdoor theater !         It was a perfect day for swimming! It was like 90 degrees and hot as balls! Then when the sun went down, it was HUMID, SO STICKY!       I ’m freakin’ exhausted! I just got home about 2 hours ago, 9 hours in the sun is a lot! But also, like I was running around playing with the kids like a damn 12 year old and now my old 28 year old body is SCREAMING!            So I am going to bed now!         I hope you have all had a wonderful weekend so far!    P.s. My body is on fire... i'm burnt and old! 💩 XOXO 

  Makes 2 servings!  15 carbs per serving!     Whipped coffee chocolate mousse!    1 cup heavy whipping cream 2 tsp stevia 1 tsp raw, unsweetened cocoa powder  2 tablespoons of cream cheese 1 tsp of dandy blend 26 Lily’s chocolate chips (your flavor choice!)          Add your cream, stevia, cocoa and dandy blend into a mixer (or use a hand mixer!) and whip until the peaks are stiff, stop the mixer and add your cream cheese in and let it whip for an additional few minutes until it looks light and airy!         That’s IT! SO easy!         You can eat it just like that or pop it into the freezer for a something similar to ice cream!         Let me know down below if you try this recipe and what you think!         Also, this recipe is extremely versatile and you can use so many flavors!         I hope you all...

     The only thing that was ever wrong with me was my belief that there was actually something wrong with me.          Nobody is, “normal!”         So be your most authentic and courageous self! Because how you see you is the only thing that actually matters!               That’s all I have for you today! Sometimes all we need is the reassurance that everybody struggles, everyone feels abnormal at some point in their lives and there is absolutely NOTHING wrong with you.      XOXO 

     The colder months are coming! You know what that means?! Wanting to be warm and snuggled up and cozy! So I pulled out my sewing machine and made some rice bags!          Back story: during the height of the pandemic, I bought a sewing machine, taught myself how to use it/sew so I could help make masks for people! They weren’t perfect, but they did the job and I tried my best to be apart of the solution!         Anyway, I pulled my machine out today to get a little crafty and made some Halloween rice bags! I am obsessed with how they turned out and before you say anything, no, one person doesn’t need THREE rice bags (I have more, but you know, three new ones) BUT, now I can put one on my feet, my back AND my shoulders all at the same time, no shame in my game!         I am getting pretty good at controlling the material and sewing a straight line! Trust me, it’s harder than you think!  ...

          Started out my morning 7 AM with a 5 mile bike ride! It felt nice to sweat again, early in the morning! I mean, I showered and then crashed hard for a few hours! Then I went and did some grocery/fun shopping and then went to Qdoba for dinner, 10/10 recommend!        I slept like absolute shit! (I have been lately!) It 100% has something to do with anxiety! I ’m working hard on getting it under wraps because I REALLY want to sleep again!      I miss my bed when it’s comforting me instead of feeling like i’m sleeping on bricks!          I personally feel like I need to start decorating for fall, like righttttt now! My heart is SOOO ready for the season! The atmosphere, the weather, the decor, the food and drinks, the clothes, the smell in the air, ALL OF IT! My heart craves it!         Anyone else?        No, just me?! Cool.      ...

     Officially planning a trip! In the next few months I ’ll be going on an adventure! The location is hush, hush right now, BUT! I am incredibly excited! I’ve already been to Florida this year, but it isn’t enough. If traveling was free, my people would never see me again!       I haven’t been feeling it lately! I have been finding myself in a bit of a funk! I’m feeling slightly depressed. I can’t put my finger on it exactly, but I know that with time, again, i’ll be back to my happy, free lively self!           I did some experimenting today with some healthy, sweet recipes!         I did peanut butter chocolate chip swerve cookies (swerve brand! Added powdered PB 2!) and homemade reeses (chopped up keto reeses!) ice cream made the old-fashioned ice/bag/salt method!    Raw! Cooked! Ice cream in process!       Then you guessed it, I MASHED them together and made ice ...

    You know what I miss? Being a kid and knowing that if I got 3 hours of sleep every night that I would still have all the energy the next day to do whatever I needed to do!        Now, as an adult if I get 3 hours of sleep I have to rip out my own organs to keep myself awake!         But, I always do what I have to do because that is part of adulting!       Anyway, today was another low key day! I am still working on commissions and mostly sleeping! I am doing my absolute best to catch up on sleep because I have a feeling that the next few months are going to be extremely busy!         I am in the process of planning several trips, narrowing down where to go and what to do!         If you have any suggestions, let me know!         In the meantime, I hope you’ve had a relaxing Sunday! I’m going to get some much needed rest!  ...

     I used today to sleep ALL day! I have been on roller-skates lately! The longest I ’ve been at home is today! Several hours to do nothing but SLEEP!        Don’t get me wrong, I’m grateful for the busy life! Idle hands give me anxiety! When I’m not filling my time with something, I feel like I’m not contributing enough, which in turn, gives me more anxiety!          I guess that’s something I need to work on! I don’t need to be 100% everyday all day! I have earned the right to rest and recover and not feel badly about it!         And yet, I still find myself feeling bad for sleeping longer than 3-4 hours. That’s insane when most people sleep 6-8 hours a night (as recommended!)         It is what it is, it’s psychological for me! I have to get the negative thoughts out of my head!         Anyway, I came to a realization today and it’s this:  ...