Welcome to the jungle... (if you sang that, you're my kind of people!)

    Back to being nauseated. I guess I just don’t freakin’ know at this point. I have been meticulous about the gluten free diet. 

    I guess I AM about to start my mother freakin’ period. YAY for being a woman and having literally no control over your body for 7-10 days a month. It’s so wonderful! 

 

    If you’re a man reading this, consider yourself very lucky. I will literally fight you on this. 

 

    I am also giving some of the nausea credit to the fact that I am so stressed and anxious about all the changes and the way I’ve been feeling that I’m bound to feel a little run down and crappy because of it. 

 

    I am trying my best to stay positive and be less anxious but if you don’t know anything about anxiety disorders, you don’t know that it’s really freakin’ hard to stop your brain from wandering to those darker, scarier places. If you DO know anything about anxiety disorders you know that once you start being anxious about something, it usually doesn’t just go away.

 

    It’s getting scarier and scarier over here, I genuinely don’t want to eat anymore because whenever I do, it causes me to not feel good. I don’t even feel hunger pains anymore. I haven’t in about 3 weeks which I find very strange. I don’t know, this whole process is teaching me that listening to our bodies is so freakin’ important and if you’re ignoring problems, down the line, they’re going to come back and bite you right in the ass.

 

    Here’s to praying that a doctor will actually help me. I have some serious PTSD when it comes to doctors. 

 

    Also, I am praying that all the medication that I ordered comes in soon! Because I am remaining hopeful that it’ll help me. 

 

    On top of all of this, I slept wrong a couple of nights ago and my neck and shoulder are toast! So here’s to only being able to see half the room that I’m in because I can’t turn my neck to the right. 

 

    I’d cry, but I don’t know if I’d ever stop.

 

    Another day, another shit show! Buckle up, because it probably will only get worse from here! 

 

XOXO