Stripping your goat!
Someone recently said to me, “that’s not me just stripping your goat” and I fucking felt that. She meant to say, “That's not me stroking your ego.” 💀😅
(Literal words from my goofball sister after she complimented me and I cringed!)
I literally died laughing! It was the highlight of my whole day! I truly stopped caring about the things people say and think about me a while ago, but sometimes, it just gets to you. Here’s just a few of the things I’ve been dealing with:
No, I did NOT have weight loss surgery! (Nothing wrong with that, but not for me!)
No, I am NOT taking weight loss pills! (I don’t do pills of any kind.”
No, I do NOT, “air box” whatever the hell that is. (Sexist much?)
No, I did NOT have cosmetic surgery, this is just my face. (Like, am I uglier? Prettier? Sorry this is just my face.)
No, these are NOT my real lashes, they’re falsies.... like really? (They’re naturally long, thick and flawless. JK- I’m part fucking Asian... they’re non fucking existent.)
No, I do NOT want to show you mine if you show me yours. 👌
Yes, I AM on a weight loss program that teaches proper food proportions, how to feed your body what it NEEDS and not what it WANTS. ( Learning about food is my favorite!)
Yes, I DID have emergency gallbladder surgery! (Due to rapid weight loss!)
Yes, I DO feel a lot more confident in the person I am now, so I take pictures of my face, weight loss journey and anything else that I want. (I don’t hide from cameras anymore! No apologies!)
Yes, I DO box with a 100lb bag that’s sitting in my living room. (And a speed bag, and weights)
Yes, I DO eat real food every single day. (Why is this even a question... No, I eat my nieces plastic fucking kitchen accessories.)
Like I literally have had people tell me that I look so different that they think I got cosmetic surgery. Nope, sorry this is just what I look like when I’m healthy.
“ArE yOuR ChEeKs rEaL?!” That’s how fucking stupid you sound when you ask asinine questions. 👏
I also still don’t fucking care what people think, let them talk! BUT sometimes, sometimes you just have to bitch about it, get it out of your system and move on! Because people are always going to talk, speculate and invent realities that fit into their narrative! At the end of the day, I know the truth and am more than okay with myself!
It’s truly impressive what people are able to come up with. On a side note, I have also been fielding dick pics... I’m nearly 30 (okay, okay, almost 28!) and don’t want to see your teeny pathetic dick pics in my inbox; it’s weird and gross. So, if you’re reading this and you’re that guy, please know that 98% of woman don’t want that shit. Me included.
Anyway, aside from all that nonsense, I have been having a pretty decent week! It looks like a child (or a Karen, I don’t judge!) angrily shook a snow-globe outside right now and school is already being canceled. I went out for groceries earlier (pre-storm) and got caught mid storm! It was a complete white-out and I couldn’t see the road or signs around me. I’m a confident driver and I am used to Michigan winters, this was on another level of anxiety for me! I realized that I don’t like not being able to see where I’m going.... who knew! (Pretty standard, I feel!)
I had a session with Deb yesterday and it went like this:
Deb: You hate attention, how are you feeling right now since you seem to be getting a lot of it?
Me: Well, if you’re asking if I still hate attention, I do. It wigs me out! But, I have decided to make an effort to not cringe anymore when I am shown positive attention. It’s new and hard, but I’m trying.
Deb: So, getting 3,000 comments and reactions on social media didn’t freak you out?
Me: Hell yes it freaked me out! It literally made me cringe every time I got a notification and they went off for 4 days straight. I just filled my time with creative projects to avoid it.
Deb: Why did you avoid it?
Me: It was easier than reading all the nice things that people had to say about me. I guess I am still struggling with compliments and it’s a constant battle between my brain and my emotional response to kind thoughts.
It went on longer than that, but It made me realize that war is always going to exist, it’s just about how hard you fight to keep it at bay.
With that being said, if you’re in a snowy place, please stay safe out there and have a blessed rest of your night and an amazing Friday!
XOXO
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